Today at work, my co-workers noticed my engagement ring for the first time (normally I'm wearing gloves all the time so they don't see the ring). One of my co-workers, Jen, saw it and asked when we're getting married. I immediately said "a LONG time from now- after we graduate." I went on to explain that we're young, and in no hurry, so we're waiting a little bit to get married. As I related this story to Daniel later that day, he asked why I didn't just say December of next year. I realized that I was purposely trying to explain that we're waiting a while because we're so young. As I've gotten to know my co-workers better, and we've had time to talk and get to know each other, I have been avoiding the word "fiance." It feels so weird to say it, and I'm always afraid people are going to judge me. I assume that people are thinking I'm too young, I'm acting impulsively, etc. This is completely a personal thing. Nobody has ever been that judgmental (at least out loud) when I've mentioned that I'm engaged. I don't know what my problem is with it. I'm not embarrassed exactly, but it's more like I don't want to have to explain. Every time it comes up that I'm engaged, I immediately follow it with an explanation that we've been together for 7 years, we're waiting until we graduate college, we're still too young, and a million other apologetic explanations. Why do I have to explain my relationship to other people? I have no idea! My co-workers today were totally supportive. Jen even said, you don't have to explain to me I'm not judging you at all. She said that she doesn't know anything about our relationship and she doesn't have the right to decide if we are ready to get married. That made me feel better, but the fact is that it's not other people that make me feel judged. It's myself. I've always felt the need to get complete strangers' approval. I think this may be something to work on. And I can start by not hesitating to tell people I'm engaged.
On an entirely different subject, Daniel and I are sharing my computer for the next week. Last night Daniel slipped on some fresh ice and landed flat on his back. With his backpack on. With his computer in his backpack. The screen is completely distorted with all these weird colors, so he sent it to get it fixed. Luckily it was still under warranty. And Daniel was also carrying his tuba when he fell so he's just glad his tuba wasn't damaged at all.
Today I got home from work early and completely cleaned the house. I swept and mopped the floors, took out the garbage, sanitized the kitchen counters and kitchen table, cleaned the stovetop, and even took out the shelves in the refrigerator and washed them in the sink. And I dusted. I want the house to be super clean when my Mom comes one week from tonight! Yay!
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