Why don't I feel happier?

I'm done with winter quarter 2009.  The hardest quarter yet.  So why aren't I jumping for joy?  

This morning I woke up at about 7am feeling extremely nauseus.  For two hours I laid in bed wondering when I was going to throw up and be done with it.  Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately) it never happened.  So when my alarm finally went off at 9:15, I knew I had to get up regardless of how I felt.  I figured I'll just push through the nausea and when I'm done with my final, I can come back and go to bed.  I felt a little better after a shower.  It was almost like every few minutes, my body remembered that it was nauseus and I felt it really bad for like a second and then I was okay again.  Really strange.  When I got to the classroom, I let the proctor know that I wasn't feeling well so if I ran out of the room she would know why.  And about 2/3 of the way through, I did get up and run.  I seriously thought I was going to throw up right in the middle of the test.  I couldn't find the bathroom, and I ran right into my professor.  I asked him where the bathroom was and he pointed.  I didn't throw up, and after a few moments I felt better enough to go back in and finish it.  Needless to say, I rushed through the test and wasn't really concentrating as much as I could have been.  I made an educated guess on half the problems.  So I do not feel happy about it at all.  All the studying I did was wasted because my body decided to get sick that morning.  And the worst part is that about 30 minutes after I got home, I felt a whole lot better.  

So I had lunch with Daniel, Hope, and Jeff, hoping that food would make me feel better.  And it did.  Hope and I went to the mall.  We both had coupons for Victoria's Secret.  That was really fun.  And on our way out, we stopped at the jewelry store to look at engagement rings.  Hope is the perfect friend to look at diamond rings with.  She's such a romantic.  In less than an hour, we'll head to the airport.  

The only thing that makes me feel better is that even though I think I did terrible on the exam, I still think I probably did better than most.  I'm really happy as long as I beat the average.  But we'll see.  I really have almost no idea what my grades will be this quarter, and that kind of scares me.  Now I need to stop thinking about that, and look forward to a relaxing week in sunny Phoenix.  I'll probably go shopping, spend time with my mom, get a haircut (which I desperately need- my hair is driving me insane!)  and see some old friends.  It will be a well-deserved break I think.  And then I get to start all over.

Finals and dogs

I have really lost all motivation to study. I studied for about 4 hours today. Not nearly as much as I did for Biology. But at this point, I'm more focused on packing and flying home tomorrow. This happened to me last year too. I did awful on my physics final because it was the last day and I was flying home that afternoon. At least I have a little room to do not as well in chemistry because I did so well on my last test. Pretty much everyone else except us poor science and music majors are done with finals. The residence halls are really quiet because most everyone has left. Hope was very cheerful today because she finished all her finals. She was doing a happy dance while I was sitting there with my chemistry book open trying to study. Ugh. It's not fair. But I have to remember that a few days ago I was happy it was on Saturday, because that gave me extra time to study. But now Hope and Nikki and everyone else is going out for dinner, watching movies, and celebrating. Tomorrow the second I'm done with my test, I'm calling Hope and we are going to have lunch together and then go to the mall. We both have coupons for victoria's secret so we're going there first.

I also finished my physics take-home final today. It was ridiculous. I feel like 80% sure about the first problem, and 95% sure about the second. And the last one, I'll be lucky if I get any points on. I had no clue what the problem was even asking and I couldn't find anything about it in any one of our three textbooks. I finally found a homework problem (which I didn't do) that was very similar. My professor had posted the solutions to the homework online, so I just copied it exactly. Even though the numbers were different and the problem itself was slightly different. I figure, if it looks sort of right he might give me partial credit. Then this afternoon I talked to one of my friends that's in that class with me and we compared answers. We got the same answers in the second one. I explained to her how to do the first one. She stayed after class last week to ask him about that homework problem, so she knew how to do it. When she started explaining, it was so involved and complicated, I gave up. She said it took him about an hour to explain how to do it. How can he expect us to spend an hour on one problem? It's ridiculous! Even if I knew how to do it, I don't think I would. Not worth it. I'm just glad that class is over.

My newest obsession is figuring out which dog breed to get. As soon as we get a house, I want to get a brand new puppy. For a long time, Daniel and I both really wanted an english bulldog. And I still think that would be wonderful, but I also think we can get a fluffier and more active breed. So now our short list includes border collie, goldendoodle, australian shepherd, and my personal favorite, samoyed. If we had a bigger backyard, I would totally want a bernese mountain dog, but that's not realistic at this point. After I saw pictures and watched youtube videos of samoyeds, I really really REALLY want one. They are so adorable and they were actually bred to be companions, so they are super affectionate and love people. The only downside is that they are very fluffy with white hair so they shed a lot. But honestly, I don't think it will bother me that much. The puppies look like tiny white teddy bears, they are so cute!! I want one so bad. Another downside is that it's hard to find pure-bred samoyed puppies at a shelter. We would probably have to go to a breeder. But at this point, I want one so bad that I am totally willing to do that. I think they are absolutely adorable.


Now Daniel and I have to figure out the whole timeline for the house/puppy. I am a little concerned, because if we don't get a house, then I need to apply for housing on campus-- soon. So basically I need to know for sure whether or not we're getting a house. Daniel talked to his mom yesterday and she said that they are definitely getting us a house. So that's settled. And they're going to try to go for sooner rather than later. If we find a house we love, and the stock market is doing well and all goes right, we should be able to close right when school ends in early June. Then we'll have all summer to get the house ready and actually live there (instead of with my parents- ugh). So then we have to figure out when to get a puppy. I want to get one right away of course. But Daniel thinks we should wait until we get back from Europe. But my thinking is that when we get back from Europe we'll only have 3 weeks before classes start to bond with the puppy and train it. If we get it before, we'll have about 6 weeks before we leave to go to puppy school and bond with it. Then either Hope, or my parents, or Daniel's parents can take care of it for a few weeks while we're gone. It might just come down to when we can find a puppy though. I mean there isn't always a litter of samoyeds waiting to be adopted. So we'll see. But how exciting that in about 3 months, we'll have our first home! And Hope is going to live there over the summer too! I love it :-)

I should be studying. But I don't want to. I know enough chemistry, right?

2 1/2 down, 1 1/2 to go

It's hard for me to believe that I'm going home in a few days.  I feel like I just had my spring break.  But after this week, I'm going to need a nice long break.  I spent the last 24 hours completely cramming for biology, and I think it paid off.  I had a nice system going of reading the chapter while looking through the lecture powerpoints, and doing online quizzes to test myself.  After about 4 of the 6 chapters, that got old and I got kind of lazy.  I didn't read the entire chapter or really look through the lecture notes.  I figured the lecture was just a few days ago, so I would remember it.  When I took the test, it was very obvious which chapters I skipped.  I flew through the first 35 questions.  Then I pretty much guessed on about 10.  For some reason, I'm not upset with myself.  I think I feel like I really learned a lot and that makes me feel good about my grade.  I guess I'll find out.  I would be completely surprised if I got an A, and really upset if I got a C.  

Now I move on to Chemistry.  I have spent the last 2 1/2 hours reading the textbook and doing example problems in the text.  I've done surprisingly well and it's amazing how much better I understand the material after reading it.  It makes me wonder why I go to class at all because I just end up reading the book and understanding so much more.  But maybe I understand it so well because the information is already in the back of my head somewhere from the lecture.  Anyways, I was doing really well until about 4/5 of the way through the chapter.  This entire chapter is about predicting what kind of reaction will happen and how fast the reaction will happen based on a set of conditions.  Each section of the chapter adds another variable that will affect the reaction.  I was doing really well until about the 5th variable and now it's too much for my brain to hold and it's all spilling out.  So I think it's time for a break.  I have been summarizing each section and then at the end I'll write it all down and do a ton of example problems with my summary there.  Then my goal is to take the summary away and see if I can remember most of it.  The good news is, I have until Saturday morning to get all of that done.  So no rush.  Tomorrow morning my professor is holding a review session so I'm hoping to have most of my studying done by then and during the review I can see what I need to go back and work some more on.  I think it's a good plan.  I always do better with a plan anyways.

I have started my physics "take-home" final.  The first problem took me about an hour, and I'm not even sure I did it even partially correct.  I couldn't find anything in our textbook about it.  It seems I should have gone to class that day.  But it's alright, I think he is going to curve so much that I'll end up with at least a B almost regardless of how I do on this test.  You can see how motivated I am to do well.  ha.  I think it's time for some chocolate ice cream.

I gave in.

I got a Twitter account. What finally did it for me was watching a TED talk from the creator. He made it look really cool. But so far, I'm unimpressed. I haven't really found anyone worth following or that updates regularly. I guess it isn't quite there yet. And honestly, isn't it just facebook? I mean "tweets" are just another word for "status updates" right? So why would I update my status twice? That's just kind of annoying. So we'll see where this goes.

Right now I have much more important things to worry about. Namely, finals. Yesterday I had a break-down moment. Daniel got upset with me and asked why I've been so mean to him lately. I realized that I've been so stressed out and I take it out on him sometimes. I feel terrible about it, so I'm trying hard to be nice. Daniel knows exactly what to do when I am overwhelmed and about to have a nervous breakdown. He hugs me until I calm down. It works every time. I don't know what I would do without him. Yesterday was actually a pretty busy day and I really didn't want to waste an hour and a half going to physics that evening. But, he was handing out the take-home final exam so I couldn't exactly skip it. When we got there, I realized that the entire class was just handing out the exam. He didn't lecture at all. That put me in a really good mood so the rest of the night I felt much better. And then I went out with all the girls to the Melting Pot. To be honest, I wasn't really looking forward to going. It sounded like a lot of work to get all dressed up and drive there and all when I really should be studying. But after I did get all dressed up, I got excited and I'm glad I went. It was a good de-stressor. I always have a good time with the girls. And chocolate always helps.

It has been extremely cold since I got back to Denver. It snowed Monday night and I actually had to pull out my boots and coat. I really thought that spring was here for good, but I guess not. It's going to be in the 40s until I leave for Phoenix. Then it'll be in the 80s lol. It'll be nice though. On Monday when I get back, I'm going to chop all my hair off. I haven't decided exactly how short to go. Definitely above my shoulders, maybe even up to my chin. We'll see how adventurous I'm feeling that day. I was going through old pictures to see what I looked like with short hair, and I came across some old ones of Tyler. I found some videos that Daniel and I had taken so I posted them on facebook. They made me so happy. I watched them like 3 times. Babysitting Tyler made some of my happiest memories in high school.

So back to finals. I just took my spanish one which means I never ever have to take another spanish class or another spanish test again in my entire life! I am so happy about that. I find foreign languages incredibly boring. Last night I got my take-home final for physics which is due on Friday. Tomorrow morning is biology. I am going to spend most of my afternoon and evening preparing for that. Tomorrow and Friday I will study for my chemistry final which is on Saturday and then I fly home! This morning was my last biology lecture. I got back the quiz I took last week, and I got 100%! That was a huge motivator to keep studying hard so I can do well. I think at this point the highest I can hope for is a B+, but that's okay. I have worked really hard so no matter what I think I'll be okay with it.

The wedding!!

I finally have time to post about my amazing and busy weekend. I left on Wednesday night and flew home. The whole family picked me up from the airport, but honestly I was really tired and kind of went straight to bed. The next day, we all went to a spring training game. It was nice to spend some time with the entire family. It'll be the last time for a while since Aaron leaves tomorrow for boot camp. Mike was also there so I got to talk to him a little bit. Mike caught a baseball that one of the players threw into the crowd. We had awesome seats, really close to the dugout. Nicole and Mike ran over to try to get Orlando Hudson to sign it, but instead, Antwan Bolden signed it. I don't really know who that is, but Nicole informed me that he is a very famous Cardinal's football player. I guess he's friends with Hudson and he came with Orlando's wife and son to watch the game. So Orlando Hudson wouldn't autograph anything, but Antwan Bolden did. Weird.

Anyways, that night was the bachelorette party. Nicole planned most of it, and she did a really good job. She had decorations, party favors, catered dinner, and reservations for the Melting Pot! Yum! It was just the bridesmaids. We got all dressed up, talked about the wedding, and ate lots of chocolate. We played a little game to see how well each of us knew Beth and Jacob, and then to see how well Beth knew Jacob. It wasn't really a contest because Allison, Nicole, and I all knew Beth about equally well and Beth knew all of Jacob's answers except his first word ("moon"). That's pretty good considering, I don't even know what my first word was. We spent the night at the hotel and then the next morning all went to get our nails done. They had two people there to do all of us and the mothers, so seven people all together. It took a couple hours. Then Nicole and I went home to rest for a few hours before the rehearsal.

We drove over to the wedding location and that's the first time I had been there. The hotel was beautiful and the wedding coordinator was super nice. It was also my first time meeting the groomsmen. My "escort" was Jeremy, one of Jacob's friends from elementary school. Lucky Nicole got James, the only one that I knew. But actually all the groomsmen were really nice and generally gentlemen. A little clueless when it comes to weddings, but most guys are. Tyler was a perfect angel at the rehearsal doing everything he was asked. Then we drove to Scottsdale for the dinner. It was delicious! I'm definitely going back to that place sometime. The whole wedding party sat together and the families sat together. Jacob gave a beautiful toast. That's when I really got to know the groomsmen, actually James. Jeremy and Cory were kind of quiet on the end. But James was really fun. I am surprised. Ever since Tyler was born, we've had a difficult time accepting him, but to be honest he is a great dad and it's obvious he really cares about both of his boys. And he is just fun to be around. We got home a little after ten, and went to bed because Saturday was the wedding!

We had to stop at Wal-mart to pick up supplies to decorate the car. We figured the boys probably hadn't thought about it and we wanted to make it as easy as possible so they would actually do it. We got silly string and some cheap cans and window paint. Then we headed to the hotel. The hairdresser was already there finishing up Allison's hair, and I was next. She set my hair in big huge curlers so I got to sit around for a while looking quite strange. Karen made bows and barettes for all of us to use in our hair to keep with the pink/orange theme. They were so cute! While the hairdresser did our hair, we got the candy bar ready and all decorated, and had lunch. It was really fun hanging out with just the girls. We went downstairs to decorate the wedding location and reception. We tied ribbons on all the chairs and it looked beautiful. The colors were so cute all together. There were conferences going on inside, so we had to wait for them to finish before we could put out the table settings and set up the candy bar. The hotel kinda dropped the ball on that. They said we could have access to the rooms at 2:00pm, but of course it was 3:00 before we could get inside. And even then, there was one guy moving the chairs out, setting up tables, and putting on tablecloths. Karen let the wedding coordinator know that we were running out of time so they would get some more people in. In the meantime, we laid out the tablecloths outside and taped different colored ribbons to the underside. When we flipped them over, the ribbons hung down. It was such a neat idea!

We realized at about 4:00 that we had better head upstairs and do our makeup and start getting dressed for pictures at 4:30pm. Allison and I went first, and then Nicole and Dana came up a little later. The florist came and brought our gorgeous bouquets. Beth and I couldn't stop talking about how beautiful they were. And of course Beth took a ton of pictures. She says taking pictures makes her calm, so all day she had her camera with her. Then we got all dressed. Beth helped us put orange ribbons on our dresses and make some final adjustments with our shoes and stuff. When I first saw Nicole and I together, I thought we look so much like twins! It was cute. We helped Beth get dressed and then Tyler came in with his cute little tux on. He was so adorable. Beth was really happy to see him. She got her makeup done, and it was time to take pictures! Walking through the hotel was fun because people kept staring at us. We got the pictures done in a half hour and then we had to back up to the room so the boys could take pictures. So it was just waiting until we got the call to go downstairs and start the ceremony.

I was so excited to see all the guests and walk down the aisle. I was also really nervous because the shoes Beth got us were really tall heels and I was terrified that the heel would get stuck in a little crack and I would fall. I told Jeremy to walk really slow so I wouldn't fall. The ceremony was so beautiful, especially the sand pouring ceremony. And their vows were so cute! I may copy that for my wedding. After the ceremony, we walked back down the aisle and as soon as we were at the end, the shoes came off! Wendy told us we could leave them off for the pictures if we wanted, and we were all happy to hear that! Another whole round of pictures, and it was time for the reception. Beth was very strict that we were not going to leave everyone inside waiting for too long, so there weren't too many pictures. The DJ explained to us the announcing and all that. I loved walking in with everyone cheering! It was so fun. And then dinnertime! It's great being a part of the wedding party. We were served first for everything. And we got to talk to Beth and Jacob. The dancing was really fun. Especially dancing with Tyler. I miss him so much when I'm in Denver, but I got to spend a lot of time with him this weekend. I wanted to catch the bouquet, but Dana was very aggressive in that regard. Beth told me that she tried to aim it at me, but oh well. I thought the honeymoon dance was adorable. I'm definitely doing that at my wedding. Nicole and I were there until the end, which ended up being quite early. About 10:30 everyone was clearing out. I got to talk to Lucia for a little bit which was nice. And then Nicole and I helped clean everything up and we went home. That was it, no more bridesmaid for me :-(

I felt so honored to be chosen as one of the few non-family members that Beth wanted to be in the wedding. It was such a blast. I love Beth and Jacob and I am so so happy for them. They deserve a happy-ever-after. And now it's time to look towards my wedding. I think we'll have to rethink the Estes Park thing. Beth had 204 guests, and ours will be similar, but Estes Park only holds 80. I have also thought about having an entire reception like wearing my wedding dress and all, in Phoenix right after the wedding and before the honeymoon so all those people can still celebrate with us. But it's not the same. I don't know, it's so hard to figure these things out. Daniel doesn't understand how important it is to me to celebrate with all the church people. He keeps saying that Denver is where our future is blah blah blah. But that's not how I feel and he just doesn't get it. My church family is extremely important and I want them to be a part of the wedding. I don't know why he refuses to see that Phoenix is my entire childhood. I've only lived in Denver for a little over a year. I can't just cut that part of my life out. It's really frustrating that he doesn't acknowledge that. But when it comes to our wedding, I will put my foot down. It's important enough that he will just have to deal. And if that means having it in Phoenix, then that's what we'll do. I refuse to just leave them all out because they are a part of the past.

Well this post is long enough. I can't wait to see pictures! So far, nobody has any good pictures of me so I haven't been able to show Daniel. But I'm sure Wendy and Beth have some really good ones.

My brain just may explode in the next week.

I just realized today that finals are in one week.  Eeek!!  I woke up very overwhelmed this morning and it did not help my concentration in class.  We haven't even completed one chapter in chemistry and we're taking a test next week.  It doesn't seem right.  In biology we took a quiz this morning.  I was really nervous for it because I haven't studied at all, and once again we have a brand new professor so I don't know what his test writing style is.  But it was super easy.  I looked over his powerpoints right before it and I probably got 5 out of 6 questions right, maybe even all of them right.  I'm missing two biology classes while I'm in Phoenix for the wedding, so I printed out like 50 pages from my textbook to read on the plane.  I really don't want to, but I have to because I'm missing the lectures.  The lectures are so much easier to stay awake for.  It's worth it to go home for the wedding :-)  

I also was really nervous for a spanish quiz I took today.  Everyone else is taking it tomorrow morning, but I can't so she let me take it today.  It's over stuff we just learned yesterday so I hardly had time to absorb it let alone memorize it.  Daniel tested me on it for 30 minutes right before I took the quiz, and I know I did really well on that.  So overall, I woke up feeling overwhelmed and unprepared, but I did surprisingly well on both quizzes today.  Now I have vowed to spend this weekend catching up on biology and preparing for the final on Thursday.  Then I can spend Thursday and Friday preparing for the chemistry final.  Spanish and Physics, I'm not really worried about.  Those take minimal studying.  More like cramming right before.

I am so ready for this quarter to be done.  This has been the hardest/most stressful quarter of my college career.  Even Boston University wasn't this stressful because for some reason I didn't even care about getting good grades.  Maybe I thought there was no possible way to get better grades, so I gave up.  But now I know that I can get As.  So I'm really upset with myself if I don't.

Every time I imagine seeing Beth in her beautiful dress, and getting my hair done, and walking down the aisle in my pretty pink dress, I get so excited!  I know it is going to be beautiful and then the reception is going to be a party!  I'm also really excited to see my sister and spend time with her.  I had a great time with her over winter break, and it's been months since I've seen her.  I think we're going to look really cute in our matching pink dresses.

Yesterday we got our RA letters.  I wasn't offered a job.  I have a couple theories as to why.  One, my choices of buildings were severely limited.  Pretty much only Nagel which has a staff of 12 minus whoever was there this year and wanted to come back next year.  Two, all the gossip surrounding Daniel and I (even though it was not true).  Three, they just didn't like me and I wasn't qualified.  Ironically, the room number on my letter said "291."  That's Daniel's room.  Interesting, because I definitely did NOT put that on my application.  I have no idea where they got that as my room number.  Maybe it's there way of saying, "this is why we didn't hire you."  I think that's really strange though.  And funny.  Anyways, I'm not upset at all, because now I won't feel guilty making my grandparents pay for my housing off campus next year.  They would have to pay either way.  And I wasn't going to accept the job anyways.  Now only Daniel will have to quit and they'll only have to find one replacement instead of two.  So that's all behind me.  Now I look toward the future and a my very first house.

Shopping and Vaginas

Yesterday was a great day. We had planned with a few friends to go up to Silverthorne/Keystone. We got up early (for a Saturday anyways) and met up with Hope before driving to pick up Daniel's alumni fraternity brother Paul. He lives in a house near campus. And we drove up to Silverthorne. Hope has never been there, but we told her about the outlet mall and the beautiful mountains at Keystone Ski Resort. So while the boys went skiing, Hope and I went shopping in town. Then we met back up with the boys and had coffee and enjoyed being up in the snow. It was a beautiful day. It was around 30 degrees, but nice and sunny so it didn't feel that cold.

Driving up there was nice as always because the scenery is so beautiful. I fall in love with Colorado every time we drive up to the mountains (which seems to be a lot lately). Hope and I squished in the backseat and Daniel drove with Paul next to him. It was a quick ride up and then we stopped to have lunch. We dropped Daniel and Paul off at Keystone, and we drove back to Silverthorne to go shopping. We started at banana republic, of course. I like the outlet even better than the real store! I grabbed like 15 things to try on. Everything was around $30-40 and everything was 30-50% off that price! It was great. I also looked for Daniel and bought him a really nice shirt. Then we went to this makeup store where they had clinique for like $5 off the normal price. I have looked everywhere for clinique, and this was the first time I saw prices that low, so I had to buy some. I bought Daniel this face scrub that he likes too. We stopped in Coach and wished we could buy everything there. And before we knew it, we had to go back and pick up Daniel and Paul. We decided to meet back at Keystone at 2 so Hope and I could stop at Starbucks and look around at the little shops they have there.

When we got back to Keystone, we had to find a spot to park. We found a spot and realized after we pulled in, why nobody parked there. There was a big rut in the snow down the middle and my tire got stuck in it. I was spinning my wheels trying to get out. I stopped, and Hope and I were like "Oh no what are we going to do?" But, we thought about it and decided to pull in further at an angle and then back out at an angle so we wouldn't get stuck in the rut again. It worked thank goodness. We went to starbucks first. The hot chocolate was delicious, but I burned my tongue. It still hurts. There was a little kind of carnival going on which was pretty fun to watch. There was a ventriloquist, a juggler, the Keystone mascots (Teddy Bear and Marty moose) and some high school girls dancing. Daniel and Paul found us and we were ready to go. But first we had to stop at Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory and get some dark chocolate-covered almonds. My favorite!

On the way back, we hit some really bad traffic. I had to work at 5 and Hope had to shower and everything before her show that night. We were completely stopped for almost an hour. We actually turned the car off and got out. We enjoyed watching the cars next to us. There were three in a row. The first car we named "open container" because they kept getting out and grabbing beers from their trunk. Then they went back two cars and offered some to the girl we named "tramp stamp" because of the tattoo on her back that we could see. In between then was "boring guys" because they were boring obviously. As we sat there, we saw so many people jump over the side of the highway and walk down a really steep hill. We assumed that they had to go to the bathroom. It was ridiculous how many people decided at that exact moment that they had to go. Then I realized I had to go to the bathroom. But I didn't want to go down there because I was afraid a guy would go at the same time and see me. Tramp Stamp actually went down there and then we saw a guy get out and walk down there. When she got back up we saw her say "a guy saw me pee!" so of course that made me not want to. It took me about 30 minutes to work up the nerve, but I finally did. Paul was very proud of me. We watched "open container" and "tramp stamp" flirt back and forth for a while. It was also weird how many people in the traffic jam were around our age. But it made for an interesting time.

It was about 4:40 when I realized I better get someone to cover my shift. I called a bunch of people, and finally Nate agreed. We started moving again and got back to campus about 6pm. We met Eric (Daniel's fraternity brother) for dinner at 6:30 and then went to see Hope in the Vagina Monologues. Daniel actually bought a chocolate vagina too. It was really.... awkward looking. Vaginas just don't make as good candy as penises I guess. Anyways, the show was awesome! Hope played an old lady who never had an orgasm after a "flood" down there when she was in high school. The whole show was great. I knew a few girls in it and they were all incredible. Daniel and I worked from 10pm-1am and then bedtime! It was such a fun day. Hope and I had a great time, and Paul always makes me laugh. What a great Saturday :-)