O Chem= Impossible!!

In the past two days, I have been going back and forth between freaking out about chemistry and just not caring. To be honest, I really have no idea what my grade is right now. I'm not sure how the curve will affect my test grades and how much the homework I have turned in will boost it as well. But I know it's not good. A B if I'm lucky, a D if I'm really in trouble. And if I do bad on the final exam, it is within the realm of possibility that I could get a D in the class. Yikes. I already know I have an A in one class, and I have two finals tomorrow in biology and psychology. I'm sure I will get at least a B in those classes, if not an A. So all that's left is organic chemistry. I'm really proud of myself for studying hard and doing better in biology this quarter than I have all last year. I wish I could celebrate that and feel good about it, but chemistry always creeps into my brain.

Last night I called my parents because I needed some encouragement. They assured me that they would love me no matter what grade I get. My mom told me that o chem is notoriously hard and she had a difficult time with it when she was in college. She is convinced that I'm so smart that if I can't pass the class, she doesn't see how anyone can. That's a mother's blind love. My dad told me that I should just try my best and life will go on. I feel much better after talking to them. I have been avoiding studying because I feel overwhelmed like I don't know where to start. This is the only class that my final is comprehensive so there's just so much material to go over. And the fact that I didn't do well when I was tested on the material the first time does not leave me very optimistic about the final. I did finally spend about an hour yesterday and a couple hours today going over my notes and example problems. I have been improving and I'm feeling slightly more confident. I hope my GPA isn't completely ruined by this one class this one quarter. I wish it was over and I could just let it go. But I still have two days to obsess about it. Sunday at noon, I will be finished and there's nothing left to do but find out my grade.

The doorbell just rang, and there were flowers delivered for me! The card said "We have faith in you! Love Mom and Dad, Grandma and Grandpa" That is so sweet! I feel so much better about finals. No matter what grade I get, I know that I tried my best and in January I can start fresh and work harder. My family loves me :-)