On Baby Sleep at Almost 6 Months

On Tuesday Elijah hit what I consider to be a major milestone.  Elijah slept all the way through the night, in his crib, unswaddled, for 12 straight hours.  It was amazing!  He actually fell asleep in his crib without any rocking or shushing from us around his usual bedtime of 6:30pm.  And then he woke up happy around 6:30am.  I actually heard him let out a cry or two around 4am, but he obviously went back to sleep because I didn't hear anything else.  This makes me so happy after all the anxiety I had about getting him to sleep unswaddled.  Since we stopped the swaddle, he has mostly slept in his swing.  For the past week or two, we have been putting him to sleep in his swing, then moving him to his crib before we went to bed, and then moving him back to the swing when he wakes up for the first (or only) time.  I know that eventually he will outgrow the swing and if we haven't transitioned him into the crib, it will be really rough.  Last night didn't go as well.  He fell asleep in his swing, then Daniel moved him to the crib, and when he woke up at 12:30am he was moved back to the swing where he slept happily until morning.  Now I know that it will just be a matter of time.  Every transition we've gone through- from our bedroom to his bedroom, from the swing to the crib while still swaddled, from the swaddle to unswaddled, and now from the swing to the crib- has just been a gradual process.  So I'm going to trust that this will happen similarly.  In the last week or so, we've been able to get Elijah to fall asleep on his own in the swing.  Before it would take up to 15 or 20 minutes of rocking, bouncing, or shushing to get him to fall asleep and then we'd have to gently lay him down while praying that he didn't wake up.  It worked for us then, and I really loved rocking him, but we can't do it forever.  And I have to admit that it's nice to have that extra 15-20 minutes to cook dinner, pick up the house, and have some adult time instead of rocking Elijah to sleep.  One of the best decisions we've made as parents is to put Elijah to bed really early (6:30 or even earlier some nights) and then cook dinner and eat together after he goes to bed.  It gives us a good 3 hours of adult time in the evenings to get things done and I still get to bed fairly early.  Elijah consistently sleeps 12-13 hours at night so 6:30 isn't too early anyways.  Unfortunately, his naps are still very unpredictable.  He had a week or two in the beginning of February where he took 30-40 minute naps.  Every day I picked him up after work, he looked haggard.  It was obvious he was exhausted.  Since Sunday he has been taking 2 naps instead of 3, and that seems to be working well for him.  His first nap is really long- close to 2 hours.  Then his second nap is usually around 3 and lasts 45 minutes.  That is enough to get him to bedtime, but just barely.  He is usually very ready for sleep by 6 or 6:15.  I've been surprised that so far, Elijah's sleep hasn't been much of an issue for us at all.  I know most parents struggle with it and end up going through some kind of "sleep training."  We dabbled in it very briefly, but neither of us could stand to listen to him cry.  And it has never been bad enough for long enough for us to really need to do anything about it.  Daniel's philosophy has always been that he will grow out of it, and so far he's been right.  Every issue we've had, Elijah has grown out of in a couple of weeks.  And Daniel really doesn't mind getting up once or twice (most of the time just once) so for now we're happy.

I also briefly wanted to update our breastfeeding situation.  I'm not sure if I ever updated where we are now.  Since about Christmas, I've been exclusively pumping.  It is definitely not ideal, but it's working for us.  I'm trying to see the positives.  For example, Daniel can get up at night and let me sleep.  And I don't have to hide every time Elijah needs to eat.  And I can see how much he is eating each day.  And it only takes me 20 minutes every 3-4 hours.  But to be honest, I really miss nursing Elijah.  I loved it so much.  Most women I think really don't enjoy breastfeeding, but I did.  So it's sad that it's over so soon.  We only got 3 good months, and one month of struggling.  I am going to try really hard with the next baby to make nursing work. Elijah just prefers the bottle.  And I have to respect that.  But I can still do everything in my power to give him the nutritional benefits of breast milk.  So I am pumping every 3 hours during the day and up until a week ago, once in the middle of the night (even if Elijah slept through the night).  It really sucks sometimes.  Washing the pump parts, washing the bottles, obsessing about how much milk I'm getting, not being able to interact with Elijah while I'm hooked up to the pump.... it all sucks.  But it's important enough that I will stick with it as long as I can.  I am incredibly proud of myself for sticking with it this long. I was down to one frozen bag of milk in the freezer at my lowest point, and now I am consistently producing more than enough milk each day.  I have built up my freezer supply to about 15 now, and it's growing each week.  Elijah has started solid foods and eating so well that his milk intake has decreased slightly so that's helping even more.  My hope is to keep building up my freezer stash so that I can stop pumping before his first birthday.  Or maybe even donate some milk to a bank.  Right now on weekdays I pump first thing when I wake up at 6am, then at work at 9am, 12pm, and 3pm, when I get home at 6pm, and then right before bed (usually 9 or 9:30pm).  I was pumping once at 1 or 2am until last week when I felt that my supply was good enough I could let myself get a full night of sleep again.  Each time it takes me 15 minutes minimum, usually closer to 30 minutes.  So that's almost 3 hours a day I spend hooked up to the breast pump.  I still stress about the amount I'm getting, but not nearly as much before.  I am okay if I go a day with a little less milk (I expect to get about 4 oz every 3 hours, or about 30 oz in a day and Elijah eats 25-30 oz a day, less now that he's eating solid food), but 2 days or more and I get worried again.  Daniel left out a whole bottle of milk that he picked up from school last Friday and I had to dump it down the drain.  That was very painful.  Two months ago and I would have flipped out.  But I was able to brush it off and move on.  Breastfeeding has been the single hardest thing I've done in my life, and probably my greatest accomplishment.  I have never worked so hard at something and succeeded.  Next Monday I will have reached my goal of 6 months and I will most definitely treat myself.  Daniel's recommendation: a big chocolate milkshake.  I think that sounds like a great idea!

Speaking of Daniel, our relationship has been really great lately.  We had definitely fallen into the trap of focusing on the new baby so much we have neglected each other.  Even after putting him to bed, we were so focused on household chores and our own leisure activities we hardly spent any time really with each other.  It was both of our faults really.  To be honest, now that I'm a mother I value my "me" time very dearly and am reluctant to give it up, even to spend time with Daniel.  I didn't realize before I had a baby how little free time I would have.  But I've realized how important it is to nurture our relationship as well as having some time alone. In the last week (after a very important conversation on Valentine's Day) we have made an effort to spend more time together and it has made a huge difference.  I feel so much more connected to Daniel and it reminds me that I'm a person and not just a mother.

Abuela's Weekend

This weekend it was mine and Daniel's turn to get sick.  Thursday morning Daniel called me from work and asked if I was feeling okay.  I said yes, and he told me that he was not.  He had a horrible headache and was a bit achey and sensitive to touch.  I told him he should go home, but he ignored me.  He made it all the way until 4:00 and then finally left work.  I picked up Elijah from day care and was feeling totally fine.  Then I got in the car and on the drive home, it hit me.  I had a headache and nausea.  When I got home I was so determined to let Daniel rest that I took on all the chores and taking care of Elijah.  After 30 minutes, I couldn't handle it anymore.  I had to lay down and let Daniel help.  The nausea just got worse and worse.  When it was time to start Elijah's bedtime routine, we were both at our worst.  We realized that we couldn't take care of Elijah on our own. Daniel called our friends Eric and Hannah to see if they could come over and help just until Elijah was in bed.  We put Elijah in the bathtub and he played happily for 35 minutes.  It was such a relief.  We took turns standing next to the bathtub and laying on the couch until Eric and Hannah got to our house.  By then I was totally useless, so Daniel helped them put Elijah to sleep.  I finally vomited all of my lunch and felt a bit better.  I went straight to bed at 6:30 and stayed there until morning.  Of course I had to drag myself out of bed to pump every 3 hours and once in the middle of the night.  It was torturous, but I did it.  When I pumped in the middle of the night that was enough to send me over the edge and I vomited again.  It was awful.  Friday morning Daniel drove Elijah to day care and I stayed in bed.  I started to get chills, body aches, and headache too.  By then Daniel was starting to feel better.  When he left to pick up his Mom at the airport around 2:30, I felt horrible.  I was taking ibuprofen to help with the body aches and headache, and it didn't help at all.  I finally gave in and took aceteminophen and I felt better almost instantly.  I was trying to stick with the ibuprofen because it is safest for breastfeeding (even though aceteminophen is still pretty safe).  I'm glad I finally gave in.  By the time Daniel got home with his Mom and Elijah, I felt so much better and I was able to get out of bed and spend time with them.

So this weekend Julie was here.  I emailed the whole family when I heard about a great price on plane tickets between Phoenix and Denver, and she took advantage of it to come out here for a visit.  I am so glad she did.  I want Elijah to have plenty of time with his grandparents, even when he's too young to remember it.  It was a great visit.  Elijah was so charming.  He smiled at her so big and babbled and played.  While she was here, we made a ton of baby food and froze it.  We bought a bunch of fresh vegetables and fruits (peas, green beans, carrots, squash, sweet potatoes, cauliflower, and peaches) at the grocery store and pureed them with our baby food mill we got for Christmas.  And Elijah got to try sweet potatoes for the first time!  Julie loved feeding him and seeing his reaction.  Of course, he LOVED it and ate it all up.  He loves to eat so much.  So far, with squash and sweet potatoes, he will gobble up an ice cube (about a tablespoon) in less than 5 minutes!  And he doesn't leave any on his mouth or bib.  It all ends up in his belly.  We also spent Saturday morning buying a whole new wardrobe for Elijah in the 6-9 month size.  He's getting close to outgrowing his current size, and we had almost nothing in the next size.  We went to a local consignment store and then to Old Navy to fill in everything we couldn't find at the consignment store.  It was so much fun and Julie was very generous.  On Sunday, we played bells in church.  Elijah was perfect.  He happily played in his car seat while we rehearsed in the early morning.  Then he let all the ladies hold him and smiled at everyone.  We put him in the nursery during the first service and when we came back to pick him up afterwards, he was asleep in the babysitter's arms.  He stayed asleep while we put him in the carseat and drove to pick up Julie.  In fact, he stayed asleep for the next 90 minutes- all the way into the second service. Then he woke up and smiled and played quietly during the service.  Everybody thought he was just delightful (and I did too!).  Julie just couldn't get over what a good boy he was.  The whole morning was complicated quite a bit by a huge snowstorm that blew in.  The snow started Saturday night and came down hard literally all day on Sunday.  It was so bad that there were about 30 people who showed up for the second service at church.  By then the roads were horrible and the walkways were covered in close to 6 inches of snow.  It was all very foreign and adventurous to Julie.  It's too bad because she really hates the cold and snow.  But for one day she could handle it.  After church we got some lunch and then went home and stayed home while the snow continued to fall.  Elijah took another great nap, giving us the whole afternoon to relax.  We put him to sleep, shoveled a TON of snow, and cooked a beautiful dinner before sitting down to watch the Oscars.  We all guessed the winner in each category and kept score.  I won by a landslide!  I got 13 correct while Daniel and Julie each got 10.  Julie watched most of the movies, and Daniel and I only saw one- Argo.

Overall it was just a delightful weekend.  Julie got plenty of time with Elijah and he was a perfect happy little baby.  We got a freezer full of baby food puree and a closet full of clothes for Elijah.  Julie saw us play bells in church, and met the whole bell choir.  She also got to see Elijah's classroom and meet all his teachers.  And we all got to spend some time together.

Rough Weekend

This weekend was really hard.  On Saturday, Elijah came down with a serious stomach bug.  I think this is the sickest he's been in his short little life.  The first tip off was when he napped for 2 and a half hours!  His naps have normally been around 45 minutes, or an hour at the most.  After he woke up we fed him and then while we were changing his clothes, he vomited repeatedly.  It was pretty lucky that he was naked and on the changing table when that happened.  It was so sad, but he seemed totally fine afterward.  So we packed him up and took him to the grocery store.  He vomited again on the way to the store, and he immediately fell back asleep.  After a 2 and a half hour nap!  So we knew he wasn't feeling good.  When we got home he woke up for a little bit.  I held him on my lap while I watched TV and before I even realized it, he was back asleep on my shoulder.  He dozed on and off the rest of the evening.  He did play for a little bit with Daniel.  He could only muster up the energy to lift his head off my shoulder for a few minutes to play peek-a-boo.  He still had his beautiful smile though!  I felt so bad for him, but I have to admit that I really enjoyed the extra cuddles.

On Sunday he seemed much more himself.  He kept down some milk, thank goodness.  We tried to give him pedialyte and he did NOT like that.  We also tried some squash on Sunday for the first time.  He had a few bites, then gagged, and refused to eat anymore.  He wouldn't even eat cereal after that, which he normally scarfs down like he's starving.  His faces were so funny!  I was laughing out loud at his disgusted faces, poor boy.  We also gave him a carrot to play with (and taste).  He liked playing with it a lot, but I don't think much got into his belly.

Monday was really rough.  I had the day off work (thank you, state government job!) but Daniel had to work and Elijah's day care was closed.  So it was just me and Elijah.  I thought it would be fun to spend the day together.  I really wanted to go to the library, but it was closed.  The day didn't start out great.  He woke up crying at 6:00am and wouldn't go back to sleep.  so I didn't get to sleep in at all on my day off.  He was whiney and fussy all morning.  He finally took a nap at around 8:30, but only slept for 40 minutes.  An hour later, he was ready for another nap, but this time he only slept for 20 minutes.  He had a little cough that came around only when he was sleeping.  I think it might have woken him up from that nap and then he just couldn't go back to sleep.  But, strangely, he sat in his swing awake and happy for another 30 minutes!  I kept thinking I should go in there and get him, but if he's happy then why mess with it, right?  So I left him there.  Unfortunately, I couldn't get much done because I kept thinking he was going to start whining soon.  He woke up in a much better mood and played for nearly 4 hours!  At 2:30, I fed him a bottle, and I passed out asleep without me even realizing.  It made sense that he was tired, but he didn't fuss or anything.  So I just put him in his crib and he didn't move.  But.... 15 minutes later and he was awake.  And wouldn't go back to sleep.  I was so exhausted and frustrated.  He had slept for about an hour TOTAL split between three naps.  He should be sleeping closer to 2 1/2 to 3 hours in naps during the day.  I called Daniel and begged him to come home early, but he couldn't.  I felt like such a failure as a mom.  Like I can't do one day at home with him.  Other moms are home with their baby every single day.  Daniel tried to reassure me, but I still felt inadequate.  It was a hard day.  The weird thing is, when Daniel came home and offered to take Elijah for an hour or two I didn't want him to go.  Being a mom is so emotional.  I feel like I'm PMSing all the time.

I really hope he does better at day care today.  I'm sure he will.  We need to get back into our schedule, and he'll be just fine.  He's the best baby ever.

No More Swaddle

Last weekend we finally kicked the swaddle for good. And actually, Elijah sleeps much better now without it.  With a few caveats.  

As of last Friday, it had been weeks since Elijah slept through the night.  He was waking up twice a night consistently, which wasn't awful, but wasn't great either.  Many nights when it was time to put him to bed, he would cry and thrash around like he was trying to get out of the swaddle.  But he still woke up so much without it, that we thought we had to keep using it if we wanted to get any sleep at all.  Last week day care decided that he was rolling over well enough that they couldn't use the swaddle anymore.  So we figured if they can do it, we can do it.  Over the weekend we put him down for naps without the swaddle blanket and he did great.  So Saturday night, we went for it. He slept through the night Saturday and Sunday night so that sold it for me.  We are done with the swaddle blanket.  And putting him to sleep has been so much better.  We zip him into his fleece wearable blanket (that my Mom sewed for him- I love it!).  He quietly drifts off to sleep instead of crying and arching his back and we don't have to do all the bouncing and everything to get him to quiet down.  Since he was about 8 weeks old, bedtime has been Daniel's thing.  I just hated it.  I couldn't stand the crying, and I didn't have the patience to wait for him to fall asleep.  But now, I love it.  Elijah lays sideways in my arms and reaches his arm up to stroke my hair and feel my face.  He often strokes my lips and chin.  I just love feeling his pudgy little hand with his super soft skin.  Or sometimes I put him up on my shoulder, and he wraps his little arms around my neck and lays his chin on my shoulder.  It is so sweet that sometimes I don't even want to put him down!  

Those first few nights, he woke up a few times between his bedtime and our bedtime, so he ended up in the swing.  On Tuesday night, the swing ran out of batteries and we learned the hard way that he needs the swing right now to stay asleep.  He woke up every couple of hours and sometimes every 45 minutes.  As soon as we picked him up and rocked him, he went right back to sleep.  But we were up literally all night rocking him back to sleep.  It was brutal.  So for now, he is sleeping unswaddled in his swing.  I know we'll get to the crib eventually.  One thing at a time.

Now that we've got the swaddling thing figured out, life is just a joy.  Elijah makes me endlessly happy.  He smiles all the time, and we can even get some really good belly laughs out of him at times.  He still LOVES to eat!  He has gotten really good at eating rice cereal, so I think we will start veggies and fruits soon.  He can sit up unassisted pretty well now, though he often falls backwards when he gets excited.  Bathtime is one of his favorite times of day.  He loves to play with bathtime toys and splash around.  He has recently become very interested in the shiny faucet and soap dispenser on the kitchen sink.  It's hard to keep him sitting in the tub because he's always reaching for them.  I just love how curious he is about everything.  And just in the last week he has begun to babble a bit.  Instead of just aaaahhh and ooohhhh he has started saying things like "ababa."  We were playing with the puppets a few nights ago and he was talking back and forth to Lamb Chop.  Those puppets are one of the most reliable ways to get him to laugh really hard.  I just love it!  Every single moment with Elijah is precious.  I must be one of the happiest people on the planet right now.  Being a mom is awesome :-)

Elijah's First Ski Trip

This weekend we took Elijah up to Copper Mountain on his very first ski adventure.  I'm sure he will have many more in his lifetime, but hopefully he'll actually get to ski for all of those!  This time, he hung out at our condo with me.  On the slopes was Daniel, his Dad, my Mom, Evan, and Kristy.  Elijah did so fantastic.  Being in a new environment with all of these new people didn't throw him at all.  In fact, it seemed like he turned on the charm just for the family!  He smiled and laughed and played with all of them.  Friday night started out a little rough in the car.  We left right around his bedtime so we thought he would just fall asleep in the car.  No such luck.  Elijah screamed for about an hour before finally falling asleep.  Traffic was horrible, and the weather made the roads a bit icy in places, so it took about twice as long as it should have.  When we arrived Elijah woke up and was ready to play.  So he didn't go to bed until about 11pm that night.  Yikes.  Fortunately, he made up for it on Saturday.  He napped for about 5 hours total, most of it between 8am and 4pm when I was with him by myself.  He went to bed easily, and slept fairly well.  At about 3am he wouldn't go back to sleep, so we laid him down in bed between us and he just stared at the ceiling until he slowly drifted off on his own.  It was very sweet.  My Mom was a huge help with Elijah the whole weekend. On Sunday morning she took him for about an hour so Daniel and I could sleep later.  She stayed back on Sunday while everyone else skiied to help me pack up and get ready to go.  And when we got back to Denver she found time to complete a load of laundry and start another load, watch and feed Elijah while we went grocery shopping, and make banana bread.  She is amazing.  I was really sad to see her go.  Everything is easier when you have an extra person who can help with the baby.  And yesterday we needed it!  Elijah had a really hard time napping.  The way he screamed sounded like he was in pain.  So Daniel and I think he may be teething.  He slept pretty well last night except that he went to bed late (8pm) and was up very early (5am).  But he only woke up once briefly at 11pm.  Before Daniel had a chance to go upstairs and rock him back to sleep, Robert decided to step in and "help."  When Daniel got up there, Elijah was unswaddled and Robert was attempting to change his diaper.  Which is exactly what not to do in the middle of the night.  It just woke him up more so it took longer to get him back to sleep.  We never change his diaper in the middle of the night.  It was nice that he tried to help though.  Too bad he didn't want to help at 5:00 this morning when we were trying to get ready for work and Elijah wouldn't let us put him down.

Elijah seemed to really like being up in the mountains.  I took him out in the stroller to meet everyone for lunch on Saturday.  And then on Sunday my mom went with us and we walked around the ski village.  He was quiet the whole time, watching all the people going by.  The weather was so beautiful, we just put him in a fleece jacket and a blanket on his lap.  He had an adorable ski suit that he wore on Saturday with matching hat and mittens.  He was pretty much the cutest kid on the mountain.  But I may be a little biased.

It was a busy weekend, and a lot of work, but so worth it.  I'm always proud of myself when I take Elijah on an overnight trip.  It takes a lot of planning and a lot of extra work.  But look at the memories we made.  I am so glad he got to spend time with a few of his grandparents, and his Uncle Evan and Aunt Kristy.  And now that he's been on his first winter ski trip, Elijah is a true Colorado boy.