Thursday, April 19, 2012

20 Week Ultrasound

Yesterday was our big ultrasound!  The one where we get to find out if we're having a son or a daughter.  And we get to see all the baby's organs and make sure they're developing correctly.  I have to admit I was far too focused on the first part, and hardly even considered the second for most of the last 19 1/2 weeks.  For months I was just super excited to finally find out if it's a boy or girl.  And then the day of the ultrasound, I woke up incredibly nervous.  I realized that this could be the day that we find out one of a million possible things is wrong with our baby.  The whole day I could hardly concentrate at work.  I accidentally left my cell phone at home, so that put me on edge too.  I felt completely isolated, and I couldn't text Daniel about my nerves.  As the appointment got closer I felt my heart rate increase and I think the baby did too- he started kicking like crazy.  I felt like I really wanted to take some xanax, or at least a shot of vodka.  Something to help me calm down!  I was supposed to drink 16 oz of water at 3pm (a full bladder helps push the uterus forward for a better view), but I forgot until 3:30 when I left work to drive to the doctor.  On my way there I was so close to crying, I was so nervous.  Then I got to the doctor, gave Daniel a hug, and started crying.  I told him I was so scared and he told me that he wasn't at all!  It was embarrassing to cry in front of a bunch of strangers but I figured it's not unusual to see an emotional pregnant lady at the doctor.  And by now Daniel knew exactly what to do- distract me and make me laugh.  Which he did, and it worked.  I calmed down and relaxed.  

They called us back into a dark room where I laid on a bed on my back.  The ultrasound tech squirted hot goo on my belly and went to work.  Immediately I recognized the baby on the screen.  We hadn't seen it since 12 weeks, and it had grown a lot since then.  Daniel chatted with the ultrasound tech while I stayed mostly quiet.  Once in a while I told Daniel when I could feel the baby move and see it on the screen at the same time.  Mostly I was concentrating on not peeing as she pressed the wand into my bladder because I had to go so bad!  Finally halfway through I told the ultrasound tech that I would be enjoying this much more if I didn't have to go so bad, and she let me run down the hall really quick and relieve myself (literally).  I felt so much better and enjoyed watching the baby move around on the screen.  She spent almost an hour moving around my belly taking pictures of all the baby's organs and bones from different angles.  We got to see pretty much any organ you can think of.  Even things like kidneys and stomach that just show up as a black blob on the screen.  The spine was really obvious, and watching the heart valves open and close was amazing.  She measured the nuchal fold (an indicator for down syndrome) and it was normal.  She also looked closely at the face and lips and said there was no evidence of a cleft lip/palette.  She took a picture of the baby's face (which basically looks like a skull) and told us how cute it was.  We didn't really see it, but we'll trust her opinion.  She took a beautiful profile picture of our baby with his arm curled up on his head.  Daniel said it looks like he's Tebowing :-)  At the very end of the appointment, she moved between the legs, took a picture, and then wrote on the screen I'M A BOY!!!  I was a little bit disappointed, but within a few minutes that disappointment turned to relief and excitement.  We have a healthy little tiny baby boy!  Daniel was excited and said that he knew it immediately.  The ultrasound tech told us how much she loves having two boys.  Since we had already picked a name for a boy and a girl, we knew exactly what his name was going to be- Elijah James Rosen.  The E-name is for Evan, Daniel's twin brother.  And, as we found out later, Elijah is a Rosen family name.  Which makes sense because it is a Jewish name.  The middle name- James- is for my grandfather.

For the next few hours I tried to think of all the things that are great about having a boy.  He'll get to be in boy scouts like Daniel was.  None of that horrible middle school drama that girls go through.  We won't have to pay for his wedding.  He could be a Theta Chi like his daddy.  I told Daniel I hope he grows up to be just like him.  And I can't wait to see how much he looks like Daniel too.  I tried to get Daniel to tell me what he was excited about, but he just kept making jokes.  I guess he didn't see this as quite such an emotional and special moment.  I know he's excited, but he just didn't want to talk about it.  I asked Daniel if he was excited to teach his son how to tie a tie, or shave for the first time, or any of that stuff.  But no, I wasn't going to get anything out of him.  The only thing he was willing to talk about was why he absolutely 100% wanted to have the baby circumcised.  I was sort of on the fence about it, so I told Daniel if he's so sure then I'll let him make the decision.  He was satisfied with that.  

All evening I was repeating the name we picked in my head.  I absolutely love it.  I think it sounds perfect.  Not like a little kid name, but not old either.  It's not so popular that there will be 5 Elijah's in his class, but not so obscure nobody will know how to spell or pronounce it.  It's practically timeless since it comes from the Old Testament.  And I think it sounds great with Rosen.  It'll be hard to get used to calling the baby a "him" instead of an "it."  I'm so happy we finally know.  I feel like I can bond now.  I can call him by his name, and picture him much more clearly in my head. (Thank goodness in the profile shot it looks like he didn't get the Rosen nose!)  I'm so happy and I can't wait to meet our little Elijah!